Sunday, January 24, 2010

The best worst knock-knock joke ever

Emily: Knock knock!
Wifey: Who's there?
Emily: Knock knock!
Wifey: Who's there?
Emily: Knock knock!
Wifey: Who's there?
Emily: *giggle giggle* Knock knock!
Wifey: Who's there?
Emily: *giggle giggle giggle* Knock knock!
Wifey: Who's there?
Emily: Banana!
Wifey: Banana who?
Emily: Orange!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *deep breath* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

She's almost got the hang of it.

Friday, January 08, 2010

Marinara Sauce

A couple of people asked me about this recipe. Thought I'd share it with the world. It started out as lasagna sauce but it is great for any pasta.

Marinara Meat Sauce


These are the measurements for 1 lbs of meat. You can make as much at a time as you like.

Ingredients:

1 pound ground beef (you can sub ground turkey if you want it to taste like sand)
1 small/med onion, diced
1 carrot
1-2 cloves of garlic (mmmm garlic. more is better.)
1 28-ounce can of diced or crushed tomatoes (diced gives you more chunks of tomato. Crushed does not.)
1 12-ounce can of tomato paste
(optional) 1/2 cup of chicken/veggie broth.
2 tablespoon sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1/2 teaspoon oregano (more of this is better)
1/2 teaspoon basil
1/2 teaspoon thyme
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder/salt (not needed if you used fresh garlic above. Only here if you don't have that)
1 bay leaf

Directions:

  1. Shave carrot and dice onion into big pot and sautee with some olive oil.
  2. Add ground beef to pot and brown
  3. When browned, tell your wife you drained the meat if needed. You can actually drain it but it won't taste as good or be as thick.
  4. Lower heat to simmer
  5. Stir in both tomatoes and paste.
  6. Add the rest of the ingredients.
  7. Stir everything together thoroughly
  8. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for about 1/2 hour per lbs of meat, stirring every 10 minutes. Depending on the consistency you may want to leave the cover askew on the top to let some water escape if its too runny.